.. currently away

I am sorry for the long hiatus, currently i am so tied up with work that i do not have time for my regular meals .. promise i'll be back next week ..

.. of causes and actions

.. an update, after a few days hiatus (due to the holidays in Malaysia, i'm just lazing around doing nothing), i realised the fact that i might run out of ideas to write in this blog if nothing spectacular happens to me in the course of my daily life. I can't be telling everyone what happens from the moment i woke up and what transpires when i drive to work right ?? Having that said out, that brings me to my topic today.

.. causes and actions, it is one of the rules that i swear by in my life. Without cause, there is no action, and with action, you need to have a cause to have done that. Can't understand ? Here is a simple scenario, your mom asks you to buy salt from the shop, both mom and salt is the cause. You abide to the request, because you respect your mom, and also without salt you cant have good food. You would not be buying salt for no reason ..

.. that would be the simplest of scenarios, but the same applies if you use it in the most complex of all things in the world, friendship. Friendship is something which you build over time, and it does not happen overnight. It would take years .. years .. years .. i can't stress it enough, but it will only take one simple action to break it into pieces, and most of the time you would not know what happened.

.. the word "sorry" is abused and manipulated in so many ways as an action. If there is an misunderstanding, whether its between you and your loved ones, or between you and a close friend, or between Ah Nia, Ah Sing and you, would you be saying sorry just because you want to recover the relationship. Sorry, being the action taken, but what is the cause for you to have done it? It would be fine if its said to your mom,dad or spouses, because they share your life. But how would it apply to your friends, if you could still label them as friends because of the trust lost so easily in the misunderstanding.

.. is it worth it for you to take action ?

.. i will never do anything unless it is a friendship i cherish and value.
.. it may look like a very selfish act, but is it not what everyone is supposed to be? It is a primal instinct everyone has. Self preservation. Survival. These are the causes for me not to take action. An action taken due to cause that does not benefit me in any way, it is not worth to consider at all. A wrong action taken without a cause would trigger a lot of other actions that might cause a snowball effect that will crush you in the end.

.. confused already ?

.. space, not the final frontier

.. a big hearty congratulations goes to Dr Syeikh Muszaphar Shukor for being the very first Malaysian to be in space. I am in all means a Malaysian, and very very proud of being one despite the title above might sound satirical. One of the many firsts for Malaysia, and i am sure more would come in near future. Keeping up with the muhibbah spirit, to all Malaysians reading this, lets shout in unison,

.. Malaysia Boleh !!

.. so what is next to conquer ? We had done Everest, we had done the north pole, and now into space .. high in hopes would be walking on the moon as said by one of our Malaysian minister's, Datuk Seri S. Samy Vellu.

.. personally, i think what everyone is missing out would be the depths of the ocean. The depths still holds many secrets to date, and many is still left undiscovered. Somehow, the vast depths of the ocean is always left neglected, even in the movies ! How many deep ocean movies can you name now .. hmmmnn, Finding Nemo, Atlantis, Jaws?, Titanic???, .. those are the only few i can only recall. And how many space themed movies can you recall, LOL, all six episodes of star wars, countless spin offs of Star Trek, Aliens, Total Recall, Doom .. endless.

.. i am not a scientist or researcher, and this would be just my 2 cents, and in no position at all to condemn anyone, but why is it so hard to explore the depths of the ocean? You get more in the ocean than in space, in space you are a tourist, you go in space, you take pictures, you take souvenirs (samples), bla bla bla .. space is just oblivion, you dont even get to see aliens!

.. in the ocean, a whole new world awaits. There is still life down there, creatures that could have survived the age of the dinosaurs, or even way much earlier than that. The depths of the ocean is much closer to home, and i do hope, that in near future, if there is really plans from the Malaysian government to have a swim, i would be their first choice since i debated it first.


Disclaimer : I am in no way at all critisizing anyone at all, this is only my 2 cents and please do not take offence in this. No mermaids are hurt in the process of writing this. Malaysia Boleh !!

.. death

.. death, and a very bad way to start off the morning writing a blog of this topic. My deepest condonlences to my friend for the passing of her mom yesterday morning. I have lost those dear to me before and i share your grief and sorrow.

.. it would be difficult to cope for this lost, death leaves a void where used to be occupied by love, tears and laughter. A friend's lost is my lost too, it brings a surge of emotions flooding and numbing all my senses .. fearing the thought .. of how i would feel, if i am in her place ..

.. love is what made us human
.. grief made us human
.. tears made us human
.. laughter made us human
.. we are so fragile

.. how often you found yourself ignoring everything else around you when you laugh or cry .. or cuddled with your loved ones ? Every single subtle pulse of his of her heartbeat fuels your desire to live on, doing everything you could, sacrifices, remembering every pulse of your shared life with your loved ones .. and your family and friends.

.. how do you define life, if you do not share it with another ?
.. but how do you define life,
if you have lost another which you share life with.

.. to me, what matters most is what happens in between,
.. what matters
.. is what happens in between life and death
.. in the end, it would not matter to you

.. in the end, it would matter to those who loved you
.. the least you could do,
is to leave them with something meaningful

( .. in memories of those dear to me )

.. all about petai

.. how often would you smirk in disgust or smile in amusement when see the word petai, or even worse smell it. You either hate it or love it. I myself, have to confess that i do not detest petai in any way at all. I need my weekly fix of petai if possible. It is poison for others to smell it, but bliss for them who consume it. I have often wondered what are the actual scientific properties of petai, or even the actual English name of it .. so i set out on a quest to debunk the myths about petai. Enjoy the following data and information, and hopefully will shed some light on this bean.

Picked from wikipedia, a definition ..

Parkia speciosa (petai, twisted cluster bean, yongchaak or stink bean), is a plant of the genus Parkia in the family Fabaceae. It bears long, flat edible beans with bright green seeds the size and shape of plump almonds which have a rather peculiar smell, characterised by some as being similar to that added to methane gas.[1]
They are an acquired taste, but are popular in southern Thailand, Burma, Malaysia, Indonesia and North-eastern India and are sold in bunches, still in the pod, or the seeds are sold in plastic bags. They are exported in jars or cans, pickled in brine.
Depending on the country of origin they may be labelled peteh, petai, yongchaak or sataw (sometimes spelled sator). They are best when combined with other strong flavoured foods such as garlic, chile peppers, and dried shrimp, as in "sambal petai" or added to a Thai curry such as Thai Green Curry of Duck. When young the pods are flat because the seeds have not yet developed, and they hang like a bunch of slightly twisted ribbons, pale green, almost translucent. At this stage they may be eaten raw, fried or pickled. In North-eastern India, the seeds are dried and seasoned for later consumption. When dried the seeds turn black.
Petai has earned its nickname 'stink bean' because its strong smell is very pervasive. It lingers in the mouth and body. Like asparagus, it contains certain amino acids that give a strong smell to ones urine, an effect that can be noticed up to two days after consumption. Like other beans, their complex carbohydrates can also cause strong-smelling flatulence

Credits to PM Dr.Aminuddin AHK, Dept.of Physiology Medical faculty of UKM Kuala Lumpur for actually doing his research on petai ..

Little did you know ..... after reading THIS, you'll NEVER look at petai in the same way again! Petai contain three natural sugars -sucrose, fructose and glucose -combined with fiber, petai gives an instant, sustained and substantial boost of energy. Research has proved that just two servings of petai provide enough energy for a strenuous 90-minute workout.No wonder petai is the number one fruit with the world's leading athletes. But energy isn't the only way petai can help us keep fit. It can also help overcome orprevent a substantial number of illnesses and conditions, making it a must to add to our daily diet.

Depression: According to a recent survey undertaken by MIND among people suffering from depression, many felt much better after eating petai. This is because petai contain tryptophan, a type of protein that the body converts into serotonin, known to make you relax, improve your mood and generally make you feel happier.
PMS (premenstrual syndrome): Forget the pills - eat petai. The vitamin B6 it contains regulates blood glucose levels, which can affect your mood.
Anemia: High in iron, petai can stimulate the production of hemoglobin in the blood and so helps in cases of anemia.
Blood Pressure: This unique tropical fruit is extremely high in potassium yet low in salt, making it the perfect to beat blood pressure. So much so,the US Food and Drug Administration has just allowed the petai industry to make official claims for the fruit's ability to reduce the risk of blood pressure and stroke.
Brain Power: 200 students at a Twickenham (Middlesex) school were helped through their exams this year by eating petai at breakfast, break, and lunch in a bid to boost their brain power. Research has shown that the potassium-packed fruit can assist learning by making pupils more alert.
Constipation: High in fiber, including petai in the diet can help restore normal bowel action, helping to overcome the problem without resorting to laxatives.
Hangovers: One of the quickest ways of curing a hangover is to make apetaimilkshake, sweetened with honey. The petai calms the stomach and,with the help of the honey, builds up depleted blood sugar levels, while the milk soothes and re-hydrates your system.
Heartburn: Petai has a natural antacid effect in the body, so if you suffer from heartburn, try eating petai for soothing relief.
Morning Sickness: Snacking on petai between meals helps to keep bloodsugar levels up and avoid morning sickness.
Mosquito bites: Before reaching for the insect bite cream, try rubbing the affected area with the inside of the petai skin. Many people find it amazingly successful at reducing swelling and irritation.
Nerves: Petai is high in B vitamins that help calm the nervous system.Overweight Studies at the Institute of Psychology in Austria found pressure at work leads to gorging on comfort food like chocolate and crisps. Looking at 5,000 hospital patients, researchers found the most obese were more likely to be in high-pressure jobs.The report concluded that, to avoid panic-induced food cravings, we need to control our blood sugar levels by snacking on high carbohydrate foods every two hours to keep levels steady.
Ulcers: Petai is used as the dietary food against intestinal disorders because of its soft texture and smoothness. It is the only raw fruit that can be eaten without distress in over-chronicler cases. It also neutralizes over-acidity and reduces irritation by coating the lining of the stomach.
Temperature control: Many other cultures see petai as a "cooling" fruit that can lower both the physical and emotional temperature of expectant mothers. In Holland, for example, pregnant women eat petai to ensure their baby is born with a cool temperature.
Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD): Petai can help SAD sufferers because they contain the natural mood enhancer, tryptophan.
Smoking: Petai can also help people trying to give up smoking. The B6, B12 they contain, as well as the potassium and magnesium found in them, help the body recover from the effects of nicotine withdrawal.
Stress: Potassium is a vital mineral, which helps normalize the heart beat,sends oxygen to the brain and regulates your body's water balance. When we are stressed, our metabolic rate rises, thereby reducing our potassiumlevels.These can be rebalanced with the help of a high-potassium petai snack.
Strokes: According to research in "The New England Journal of Medicine,"eating petai as part of a regular diet can cut the risk of death bystrokes by as much as 40%"
Warts: Those keen on natural alternatives swear that if you want to kill off a wart, take a piece of petai and place it on the wart. Carefully hold the petai in place with a plaster or surgical tape!

.. so, you see, petai really is a natural remedy for many ills. When you compare it to an apple, it has four times the protein, twice the carbohydrates, three times the phosphorus, five times the vitamin A and iron, and twice the other vitamins and minerals. It is also rich inpotassium and is one of the best value foods around. So maybe its time tochange that well-known phrase so that we say, "A Petai a day keeps the doctor away" !!
.. stock up your petai's today and let us drink to health with a glass of petai milkshake.

.. macaque !!

( .. no actual macaques are harmed in the process of writing this )

.. ma·caque Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[muh-kak, -kahk]
–noun, any monkey of the genus Macaca, chiefly of Asia, characterized by cheek pouches and, usually, a short tail: several species are threatened or endangered. Originates of southeast Asia, Japan, Gibraltar, and northern Africa.

.. this particular species of the simian family had been haunting my dreams since chilhood. I am already 28 now, and once in a while, they would still sneak fiendishly into my night's rest and create havoc. Sometimes, they come in a pack, sometimes they come alone, but most of the time, irregardless of number, they wont cease to terrorize my peaceful rest.
.. ugh, the things they do, i cringe and shudder in angst everytime that smirking hairy face appears. I still remember, there is this particular dream, repeating itself over and over again, with this specific macaque with a bald patch on top of its head, and a black splotch of black fur on its belly, also not forgetting that fiendish grin, as the main actor. He is such a regular that i have even given him a name, Ah Kwong (Mr Shiny, would be the nearest translation in english, reminiscence of this bald patch).
.. i suppose Ah Kwong would be the mastermind in the attacks in my dreams, judging from the way others avoid him and gives way whenever he's around. He has this particular featish with red yarns, where he would every single time without fail, roll up an endless supply into a big round ball, rolling, rolling ... rolling non stop growing bigger each time he turns up in my dreams. This gargantuan bright ball of yarn would chase me to the ends of world everytime. At 28 years of age now, it has grown so big now, i am not able to apprehend it at all.
.. i would just run everytime.
.. every time i end up waking up, exhausted, anxious, and of course swaying my arms or kicking. Just today, i have this ache in my right foot for hitting it hard onto the frame of my bed, in an act of desperation trying to kick Ah Kwong !
.. anyone who reads this, you might be smiling now thinking how absurd this is, but isn't that what dreams are supposed to be? Irregardless, if you do happen to be an expert in dream interpretion, help me!! Dreams are somehow related to your real walking life, events which happen to you, would manipulate itself and represent itself to your subconcious self in form of dreams. No one is ever perfect, everyone has their own issues, up and downs in your life, daily problem solving puzzles which would baffle you to world's end. You will be more of yourself if you are able to identify and adapt to your problems from your dreams.
.. but in my case, with Ah Kwong haunting me, how could it actually relate to anything in my real life !!??

.. chicken story

( .. time really flies when you do things that you enjoy, but slows down when you do things that you don't enjoy)

.. chicken story, now that is really interesting, in fact i find it so amusing (yet depressing once you know the outcome), that i need to write this down. I've heard this from a friend, and i will try to relate it again as accurately as possible without any deviations from his account. This is a story about a friendship gone sour, and it might sound boring, but from the way i view it, it is indeed amusing and would like comments from visitors.

.. it all started from a chicken, a dead chicken.

.. a few months ago, a group of students of about 200 strong took a flight to UK to complete their Degree. Upon arrival, and of course recovering from the culture shock and jet lag, they settled down in their dorm. It was summer then, and mostly students there are asian. My friend, Kelvin, and one of his close friend, Marcus, both from Penang,are together in this group. It all went well, happily they went on with their lives and studies for the first few weeks, cooking for each another .. living together and sharing their new found experience in a totally new environment.
.. cooking, hmnn .. this is where the chicken comes in. Marcus met Mary, who stays in the same dorm, and Mary had been cooking for the rest since they arrived. They take turns buying grocery and delegation of washing the dishes. One day, Mary bought a chicken at a much lower price, cause it was somehow crushed during transportation or something else .. i don't know, but it was disfigured and looks rotten. The rest got disgusted, and made remarks .. Mary got annoyed .. everyone else stopped talking to her .. except Marcus.
.. Marcus became closer and closer to Mary, spending their time together. Slowly, Marcus withdrawn from the majority, dedicating his full attention to Mary. Kelvin, immediately saw a drastic change in his close friend and knew that he had lost a friend. Of course there are alot of details on these changes, but i would not want to lay them out one by one .. that would definitely bore you to death.

.. so is this called compassionate love ? You take advantage of another at their weakest moment, manipulating that lowest moment of your emotions to turn it into something strong. How long do you think this would last and at what cost do you have to pay ? Losing a friend, losing your social link, withdrawing yourself from everyone else, .. straying. How can we maintain a balance between love and friendship, is it ever possible ? How do you define friendship in this case ..
.. if its lost because of a .. chicken.

( .. names had been changed to protect myself from being beaten up and to protect the identity of the real life friends i know. Any matters pertaining life, injury, heartbreaks, love, or any innocent mosquitoes that got killed in the process of writing this .. does not concern me, i am a story teller, please treat this as crap if you think you do not like it )

.. my first step

.. congratulations to those who actually managed to stumble upon my blog amongst billions and billions within the world wide web. Most likely, you have managed to reach my personal refuge through messenger (and in no ways i pledge my support for this messaging software, just that all my friends use it).
.. i would not start off my first post telling everyone i am the lonely chap who seeks asylum and sanity through this small space online (and .. please i am really NOT one of them), i am having this blog so that i have a place to have my thoughts documented ( .. hmmnn, isn't that why we have blogs ?)
.. i am 28, in Kuala Lumpur,Malaysia ( .. thats it for introductions of myself )
.. as a brief introduction on what to expect from me, or rather what i plan to have documented within this blog, would be, of course my thoughts and ramblings whenever i feel a change in myself or people around me ( .. or anything at all regarding my country, my pet, ducks, pigs, my car, my friend's car ..... etc etc, you get the picture) and of course this blog would be a space for me to document all my poems.
.. yes, i write poems, freestyle ! I have even got one of my poem published, titled "Red Horizon", compilation of poems from amateurs and pros alike around the world, a hardcover edition book, "Time after Time", go find it in the literary section in your nearest bookstore. I would have it posted here soon once i get hold of my notebook which i have kept at home.
.. do check back this space regularly, would be slowly changing and updating as i get the chance to do so. I do admit, using the current template provided is a bit bland, but i will get it changed one step at time. A promise that i can make, would be interesting content on my rambling ( trying to figure out how to let visitors post replies, so this would be interactive, i'm new to blogging, have patience !!)
.. officially, this would be my first ever post in a blog, and so far i am enjoying every moment of it. Guess there is enough ramblings here to keep visitors entertained for at least 3 minutes up till this paragrapgh, and i do hope it is time well spent for you. Thank you for that 3 minutes, and do expect to have more time wasted ( .. or enjoyed, however you want to put it) on your next visit !!